BRISBANE NORTHSIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS

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1 BRISBANE NORTHSIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS Website: HASH TRASH It is a truth universally acknowledged that the hash trash never lies. What you are about to read either has happened, is happening now, or will happen at some time in the future. Or nearly, anyway. GRAND MASTER Murrumba Downs ASSISTANT RA Kallangur HASH CASH Kedron HARE RAISER Brighton HASH BOOZE Beachmere Pounda RELIGIOUS ADVISER Petrie Cheesecake HASH HABERDASH Bribie Island Boxy HASH TRASH Windsor Smooth Ride HASH ELDER Chermside FIGJAM SONG MISTRESS Aspley Chunda Kuntree Girl Semen Stains To & From Flower Your committee are located throughout the northern suburbs from Beachmere to Everton Hills to Windsor and many suburbs in-between. We are more than happy to take delivery of, or collect, the plates and cutlery if the holder can t make it to the next run. RUN NO: 2033 DATE: 26/06/2017 HARE: Boxy LOCATION: Upper Kedron Boxy s passage was deep, dark, damp but not virgin territory - some bugger had marked up the best route. Your scribe was not at the prelube, arriving 4 minutes after the setoff, but with fabulous marks and cries of On On heard from afar, the pack was quickly found, just in time to join the last of the queue of chaps waiting for their go at Boxy s passage. It was then obvious that one of two things had happened either Boxy s run was on the men only pages of Tinder or we d been joined by the Men s Hash. Boxy s secret passage was dark, it was damp and thanks to the Men s Hash it was packed. We spread our legs, put our ankles at an awkward angle, bent slightly forward and ploughed on through the boggy wonderland. The underground adventure wound merrily along for nearly half a kilometre, Boxy s passage exceeded expectations. The above ground part was a bit of fun too shiggy, hills, all the good stuff and nobody was lost! Back at the gazebo we were relieved to see that we wouldn t have to share the chips, the Men s Hash had continued on to their own Circle, probably best because they find it hard to control their animal desires and our Harrietts are particularly gorgeous so are our some of our blokes.

2 GM Pounda backed up to the heater, called the circle and summoned the Hare Boxy. The Run Report as told by Overproof: Absolutely awesome, nice to be joined by the gay hash occasionally, nothing like 30 men breathing heavily to make a man run faster, especially when bending over in the tunnels. Score: 10/2000 The Walk Report as told by Smooth Ride: It was dark and she didn t see any arrows she didn t do the walk. Didn t do the Letter-Box walk either. Score: 2/3,000,000 for the chips The Walk Report take 2 by To and From: Great walk, especially the tunnels, excellent company walking with tonight s virgin (more on that later). Score: 2/3,000,000 The Letter-Box Report as told by Wrong Way: It was awesome because she was with Heartstarter who also letterboxed tonight. Killer led the charge of the letterbox walkers. Score: let s give it 1/1,000,000 Total Score: 15/7,002,000 There s a skeeter on his heater wack it off HASH RELIGIOUS ARTICLES Large Appendage: Asshole Dick Fart has the large appendage, not present. Small Appendage: Abo won this last week for the most spectacular fall within the shortest (smallest) period of time as we were about 10m from the house when he cartwheeled over a manhole cover in the road. Abo awarded it this week to Mustang for falling over in the carpark before the Hash even started. GM Pounda said there s too much competitiveness in this club, people are going to start falling over before they even come to Hash. There was a Harriett and she was dumb and bimbo was her name-o Suck, swallow, breath Why are we waiting Scrubber Shirt: Tail wasn t present, carried over to next time. Brush (Vagina): Semen Stains awarded it to Boxy for causing abuse to her backside on the run, having used muscles in the tunnels that haven t been used before. He wanks his crank CHARGES: Pickpocket charged Overproof, they were waiting for the Men s Hash, a car approached headlights blazing and Overproof said oh there are the runners over there. Last night he stayed at home and masturbated GM Pounda called out Pickpocket and Thunderbox because while waiting for the Men s Hash, these two ran off to the end of the street and couldn t find the next arrow. The Men s Hash arrived, the pack set off and their lost arrow was about 5m from where these two were looking. Just goes to prove it does make you blind. Why were they born so beautiful Late Charge at the end of the circle. To and From charged Semen Stains with wearing a hat in the circle, it was a beanie and my ears were so cold that I was happy to take a charge to keep it on! She s a Harriet and she s alright (Semen Stains and Shredder struggled to remember a charge they wanted to make against the GM but their memories failed them, however.. as a late entry, it was GM Pounda s comment while pounding up Boxy s passage, that bending over made his bum hurt. Apparently you get used to it if you do it often enough.)

3 Visitor: The lovely Sharon claimed that Shredder made her come (how much did he pay her to say this?), Cheesecake said he s punching way above his weight. She s a real looker and even has a pulse. Four and twenty virgins came on the Northside Hash Returnees: None. ANNOUNCEMENTS Cheesey s Challenge happened Sunday 25/6/17, Cheesecake, Overproof, Pounda and Floater. Overproof reported that it was awesome, they had horses, motorbikes, beautiful scenery, coffee, pies and beers at the end. Cheesecake said those who missed the pain missed the pies. A buddy check was done and all were wearing their helmets the right way around. The ride was 80km, with two mountains. Overachievers added on extra travels to that. The Hash lunch has been postponed as not enough people could make it to either 1 st or 8 th of July, will aim for a date later in August. Camping weekend will be on October Wrong Way is having her 21 st birthday do-over on Sunday 30 July, all invited, address on invitations. NEXT WEEK S RUN #2034 Flasher s run, he wasn t present either he s still hungover or he hasn t been bailed out yet. 40 Camelia Ave Everton Hills Shit-Sue your roast pork rolls were divine! (Apologies if I ve spelt your name incorrectly.) They were the perfect kai to distract us from our cold ears and wet feet. PHOTOS ON THE LAST 2 PAGES..

4 The Evidence The Harriets and a willing stand-in while the Men s Hash are with us. Mustang s injury ouch! B1 still plays the sweet card when looking for hugs from the Harrietts just like his dad FIGJAM. The lovely Sharon and the overachieving Shredder. More

5 GM Pounda at the end of the tunnels. Is this fence supposed to discourage Hashers? A soggy ending. No GPS signal inside Boxy s passage.