BRISBANE NORTHSIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS

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1 BRISBANE NORTHSIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS Website: HASH TRASH It is a truth universally acknowledged that the hash trash never lies. What you are about to read either has happened, is happening now, or will happen at some time in the future. Or nearly, anyway. GRAND MASTER Murrumba Downs ASSISTANT RA Kallangur Pounda RELIGIOUS ADVISER Petrie Cheesecake HASH HABERDASH Beachmere Chunda Kuntree Girl HASH CASH Arana Hills Boxy HASH TRASH & FLASH Windsor Semen Stains & Christopher Cum Semen HARE RAISER Brighton HASH BOOZE Beachmere Smooth Ride HASH ELDER Chermside FIGJAM SONG MISTRESS Aspley To & From Flower Your committee are located throughout the northern suburbs. We are more than happy to take delivery of, or collect, the plates and cutlery if the holder can t make it to the next run. RUN NO: 2057 DATE: 04/12/17 HARE: Flasher LOCATION: 40 Camelia Avenue, Everton Hills Rain, rain go away, come again on a non-hash day! Our live Hare was very nearly donated to Fakarwee as crab pot bait. It appears that Flasher was too busy cleaning out his garage to mark the trail again, the chalk had washed away in the afternoon storm but everyone knows that Flower flour is best laid in the rain. The Hashmen looked anxiously at the low hanging clouds, strangely the chance of a moist night did not perturb the Harriets in the same manner. The Hare lead the pack out into the damp, dark night, those who survived the driveway trotted merrily on to nymphomania Nymphaea Street. The puffing, the panting, the sweaty, sweaty night was enjoyed by all except the front runners who did not appreciate the false trails how does a false trail happen on an unmarked run with the Hare behind you? HASH CASH Boxy read the run count and GM Pounda called the circle while RA Chunda poured the charges with a face like a held fart like the thunder rumbling around the ridges. Brace yourself Flasher, looks like RA Chunda didn t enjoy being lead astray by you.

2 Run Report: Pickanniny gave the Run Report, he thought that Flasher would know by now that the idea is to lose the walkers instead of dawdling to wait for them at every arrow. Score: 3/17 Walk Report: Tail gave the Walk Report, it was excellent. Score: 98/100 Letterbox Report: Smooth Ride gave the Letterbox Report, she walked to the bottom of the driveway, saw the Walkers coming back from a false trail and thought she d better demonstrate her Letterbox expertise and she continued on all the way to the corner, all the way back to the letterbox and all the way up the driveway again. Score: 1/100 Security Report: Beet-a-root gave the Security Report, she guarded the chips well. Score: very chipper Total Score: 102/217 Sing a song of six checks Religious Articles: Small Appendage Ten Fingers has taken the little one on holidays. Dick Measure (paddle) Kimasutra is currently recruiting a companion for Christmas functions and will return it when she s found one that doesn t fit the measure. Large Appendage Christopher Cum Semen was deciding between two recipients, because when he arrived he overhead Tail saying she d washed the Scrubber Shirt; the other was Smooth Ride for waiting with wine glass in hand for the bucket to arrive then standing guard over the wine bottles during the run. Smooth Ride received the large appendage graciously, thanking Christopher Cum Semen because she hasn t had one for so long. GM Pounda suggested she might place it strategically on her bedside table during open homes, to boost the sale price. She s a Harriett and she s alright Why are we waiting Grub Shirt Tail gave it to Cousin It, he s got about three months of shifts coming up which will stop him from cuming. Hammersley takes it up the Vagina Brush Flasher awarded it to Picaninny for being a shortcutting bastard. He wanks his crank in the morning Charges from the run: GM Pounda charged Christopher Cum Semen for having his birthday on a Hash night and taking a better offer instead of turning up to Hash. Hashy birthday to you GM Pounda told Christopher Cum Semen to stay put and called up Semen Stains - Smooth Ride said she d heard there d been a happy ending, she shouldn t believe everything she s seen on film. GM Pounda called them to take a charge on their recent entrapment engagement. The Semens thank you all for your good wishes and commiserations. Why were they born so beautiful

3 Semen Stains charged Pizza for overachieving, anyone who has seen him at the pub on a Saturday afternoon knows he s a dancing man but she didn t know he was a pole dancer until tonight. He swung around the poles on the sportsfield tonight with no effort, obviously well practiced. He s got a skeeter on his peeter Returnees: Picanniny Oh where oh where oh was you last week Hash Name: GM Pounda asked Mammary Stick to explain her name actually, it s a mistake and should be Memory Stick and she would appreciate her Mother Hash correcting it. Boxy explained that he named her, because when she joined Hash she had an amazing memory for names, like a memory stick. Also has a fantastic figure so duely named. Announcements: Northside Christmas Party was yesterday. Red Dress Run is next week s run see flyer attached to the and on the website. Pith Head has volunteered to do a Christmas Day Run for anyone who can t be bothered cooking. Please bring something to share (body parts not accepted, attached or otherwise). This will be a formal run, run counts to be adjusted on the Receeding Hair Line. Flasher s baked potatoes, bolognaise and slaw never fails to satisfy, much like the man himself. Thanks for a great walk (and a lousy run) on a wet evening. Champion effort. Photos on the next pages

4 The Evidence Rogues Gallery More amusement on the last page

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