Lamai Valley Wildlife

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Toby Powers
6 years ago
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1 Lamai Valley Wildlife More is sometimes less - like last Saturday. Report on Animals, Page 1

2 Lami Wildlife It all started falling apart one night at the Red Fox when Froggie was the only brave soul to step forward to set the New Year 1pm run. With over three weeks prep time it wasn t exactly as if it was short notice. Bags graciously offered assistance. Having set last year s excellent Red Dress Run, Bags is somewhat of a concrete hash specialist. His field skills in the bush, yet to be tested. However having been alongside said Bags on numerous occasions I note we have spent more time off paper than on. Not a great observer is our Bags unless it s wrapped in tight lycra. But then he does have the gift of the gab!! Our glorious leader (the buck stops here) Go Around Again accepted Froggies & Bags kind offers. There were a few shudders from the more experienced trail layers. One way or other it could be an interesting Saturday afternoon. And so it turn out to be. Having not yet abandoned our Jet Ski as clouds were heavy on the horizon. Here I insert the run directions verbatim (At a 7/11 store on the left you see the HHH sign and a road sign to Old Samui Village Report on Animals, Page 2

3 Road and to Spa Samui Village. Drive along the Old Samui Village Road approx 500m and you see the the HHH sign on the right. Park there where ever you find a space). Well we sailed past the 711 with not a HHH sign in sight. A quick u-turn at Tesco Lotus and another drive past. This time (20 minutes before our 1pm kick off) we came upon Froggie & Bags and Honey Trap lurking in the shadows, erecting the HHH sign. However the arrows on the sign pointed across the road towards Lami beach. I set off towards Maenam but obviously no chance of seeing the HHH sign as it was behind me in the Honey Trap passion wagon. It was at this time, coming in the opposite direction was the hash wagon train led by Red Mullet and the german storm troopers on their buzz bikes. They had heard a rumour the venue had changed to Lami Beach. Obviously something to do with the HHH sign pointing in the wrong direction at the 711. Further to the earlier discourse, a thought occurred to me and that is why in the name of fortune is it that during the hot months we had more than a few 9 km. plus trails lasting in excess of 90 Report on Animals, Page 3

minutes with bedraggled Rambos and Wankers sweating buckets up hill and down dale and in these cooler conditions, ideal for Hashing, we've had ludicrously short outings with Saturday's yet another

4 minutes with bedraggled Rambos and Wankers sweating buckets up hill and down dale and in these cooler conditions, ideal for Hashing, we've had ludicrously short outings with Saturday's yet another example? Answers on a postcard please. On the subject of 732, circumstances were a tad unusual but, and here think Churchill, " Never in the field of Samui Hashing have the Hares produced so many excuses for so few metres of trail" Anyway illness and Alzheimer's aside, Pissbowl stepped into the breeches on Thursday and pulled a rabbit out of the hat or was it a turkey out the oven? Main points of the run were a quick tour of the local sewage factory, paypa on the wrong side and an on in sign pointing the wrong way, oh and the small matter of him half way up a coconut tree desperately trying to affix the split sign, bless him. So 32 minutes and one point something miles later we were all safely in and quaffing round the smallest Laager site. Report on Animals, Page 4

5 In anticipation of a shit run, Dipstick was seen digging a hole, mid circle for our three, not one, hapless hares. Stand in G.M. Corky soon had us circled up and took a couple of votes, when the Rambos were asked if it was a good run there was a deafening silence so the bog seat encircled the neck of an already iced Bags. Pissbowl attempted a re-naming but as we all know, re-naming is not a whim of one person and great consideration must be taken. In 99.9% of cases it will not happen as it could open the gates to others wanting a name change. Froggie offered to take the seat but it was subsequently removed and placed over Pissbowl s head. Bags must have thought all his Christmases had come at once as he was "on in" about ten times, once for the alleged re-naming which got the whole hearted support of his Finnish goddess Honey Trap. The Kraut Buzz Troopen gave us a rousing rendition of " Germans have no sense of humour " led by Gruppenfeurher Tubby Twinky who also treated the crowd to the Hash Hymn after the Red Mugger entertained everyone by doing the unabridged version of Swing Low Sweet Chariot. Next week's Hare. Mutton Report on Animals, Page 5

Gromit then, while executing an impressive handbrake turn on departure, blew the front tyre and did the correct thing and paid a

6 Koh Samui Jeff having already buggered off left it to Corky explain that our presence will be required next Saturday down at Tom Cruise/Kraut or thereabouts. Gromit then, while executing an impressive handbrake turn on departure, blew the front tyre and did the correct thing and paid a visit to the piss truck for a quick slurp while Where's Wally supervised the wheel change, good man! So you all I'm sure enjoyed the New Years Eve festivities and here's to another successful season of KSH3 in Report on Animals, Page 6

7 Koh Samui Report on Animals, Page 7

8 Report on Animals, Page 8

BRISBANE NORTHSIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS

BRISBANE NORTHSIDE HASH HOUSE HARRIERS Website: www.bnh3.yolasite.com Email: brisbanenorthsidehhh@hotmail.com HASH TRASH It is a truth universally acknowledged that the hash trash never lies. What you